The business of business cards
It’s a truism: as the weather cools down, the business heats up. And: I have less time to blog. Which is, I suppose, both good and bad. But today, I just have to rant: why are there, pray tell, such a thing as “sensual” premium business cards? Why are there business cards of sexy women in lingerie, or a woman’s mouth with a strawberry in it? Yep, that would be super professional. No, that wouldn’t at all creep me out: to have an adult handing me a business card of a woman’s curvy figure in silhouette with diamonds on it. (I would say that the card sounds like a stripper’s business card…but do strippers carry business cards? Please don’t answer that.) I did, in fact, meet one “professional” who used the card featuring a woman’s mouth, with a strawberry between her lips: she was, natch, the very bad sex toy seller, whom I wrote about earlier this summer. My point, exactly.
Also: why are there so-called “dating” cards? Cards on which you’re supposed to write your name, number and a description. ‘Cause yes, that is super sexy. I don’t mean to sound like your me-maw, but…can’t people just exchange phone numbers? Isn’t that why Jesus gave us iPhones? Or what happened to the deeply meaningful and intimate art of sexting? Or, what about, alternatively, writing to, and then eventually marrying, men on death row? I’m only sort of kidding, having read this article (http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/16/magazine/a-death-row-love-story.html?_r=1&hpw) about a woman who did just that. As one of the, hilarious, commentators said: “I knew dating in NY is hard, but…!”
But seriously: business cards are about–watch what I do here–promoting your business. As in, selling your services or your product. As in, generating positive interest. One does not generate positive interest with a business card designed to look like a dollar bill. Or a card with an image of a topless woman. Or, covered in gold glitter. Or, if you’re a musician, no contact information, besides your website address, and then, once people visit your blog, no further way to contact you. Increasingly I find that a lot of people who say they’re in business, in reality, are not. Or, they’re in the business of screwing themselves. It’s complicated.
But here’s what’s not complicated: if you want to do business, and make money, and get your brand out there, it does help to have a simple, professional, efficient business card which makes it clear who you are, what you do and how one can contact you. It’s nothing personal, just business.