Free Your Mind

Free Your Mind

April 14, 2014 Uncategorized 0

Recently, on Facebook, the (Latino) husband of an old friend mentioned that despite stereotypes within the Latino community dismissing writing as  not “manly,” he had taken my advice and started writing. In fact, he said, he was really enjoying the process of writing and how it was allowing him to understand himself more and more.  Not to mention, he was almost at the fourth chapter of his book! That kind of news makes my day: people choosing to commit to the best within them, and disdaining the self-defeating horsesh*t of society.

Listen, as the Onion puts it, “stereotypes are a real time-saver,” and yes, they’re everywhere. And some people buy into this stupidity, because it gives them an excuse to not work so hard and put themselves in positions where they can be denied. Some people like stereotypes because it allows them to cling to fear, and not have to acknowledge that yes, everyone on the “L” train is just as human and valuable as they are. Even the girl wearing feather earrings and a YOLO t-shirt. Alas.

I think about this kind of stuff because one of the many things I love about this business are the many different people it’s allowed me to meet. I’ve been having wonderful conversations, for example, with Joy, a Christian woman from Georgia. On paper, we shouldn’t have much if anything in common. Yet somehow, on Google, all we have are great conversations and lots of giggling.

I’m not interested in stereotypes, or fears; I’m interested in interesting people. And I’m certainly not interested in denying myself opportunities because, for example, starting a business isn’t what a nice (Jewrican) girl would do. Yawn.

So next time, for example, you hold off on writing your book…or applying for that job…or starting that business…or traveling to an exotic part of the world that excites you…just understand that you’ve made it very easy for all the people who want you to stay stuck.  You’ve implicitly brought into the hate and fear of all those people who judge and dismiss you by your gender, or sexuality, or color of your skin, or religion. Why would you ever want to buy into the fear and cruelty of people who are afraid of life? These people just want you to be afraid also, because it makes them feel better.

I told my friend’s husband about this famous book: Down These Mean Streets, a landmark memoir written by the Puerto Rican author, Piri Thomas–when the book was originally published, “Latino” and “author” definitely did not go together in the national consciousness– about growing up in Spanish Harlem amid drugs, crime and dire poverty.  Mr. Thomas saved his life, and quite possibly, the lives of many others, by writing that honest, wrenching, amazing book.

If there’s something within you that you feel passionately about, you can waste a lot of time worrying if it’s “okay,” or if it’s “right,” or “normal,” for you to do what’s in your heart.  But just remember: there’s enough (stupid) people out in the world who get their (pathetic) jollies from putting you down, and demeaning you because of the color of your skin, or your last name, or your gender, or your religion.  YOU DON’T NEED TO HELP THEM!

And sometimes, these people demean you because they don’t know any better: it’s what was done to them.  If, when you were a child, for example, you told your parents you wanted to be an artist, and they said that was crazy talk…sigh. I know that still hurts. But you have a choice to make. You can keep festering with frustration and hatred (i.e. keep wasting your own time), or you can understand that your parents probably just repeated to you what was said to them and today’s a new day. You want to be an artist? Get to work, Kid. Give yourself the permission you need to realize that your voice, and your work are credible and valuable on their own terms.. and get to work.

fear

 

 

 

 

 

No one can oppress you like you oppress yourself. But if you oppress yourself, you have the power (and the responsibility) to liberate yourself by committing to the dreams inside of you.  Fear less, dream more…and get to work!

 

 

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